I'm So Sorry!

Men, even with the help of this incredible blog you may find yourself in a situation where you made a mistake and need to apologize to your girl. As always, we're here to offer you easy and painless advice to your problems. Let's have a little fun looking at what not to do first:

One night, I finally confronted Punchy about how he had forgotten to get me a Christmas present (about a month after Christmas). I didn't blame him, I just wanted to talk it out so that the incident wouldn't come between us. Punchy responded with, "Okay, I've been a jerk about this. That being said," no, Punchy, no! "It's your fault that you're so hard to buy for. What am I supposed to do when you go out and buy yourself jewelry?" You're wrongfully assuming that I wouldn't love something that you got me more than what I've gotten myself. And you're actually assuming a woman can have too much jewelry (shake my head). "Or when you constantly one up my gifts? I got you a stuffed panda for your birthday and then you go and make me a stuffed animal of my favorite character from my favorite book?!" Umm, they don't make them stuffed animals of your favorite character so I couldn't just buy one, but I wouldn't have wasted HOURS of my life making it if it was just going to make you act this way. "So because of all of this, you don't deserve a gift." Well, that last part was a bit exaggerated but considering Punchy never apologized and actually said he should have just gotten me a gift, I still assume to this day that it is how he feels. (*See our gift giving article to avoid this mistake).

What you should have said:

Guys, I understand how easy it is to make a mistake. With anniversary and holiday dates, things can get crazy and you can forget a present here or there. Heck, you might just stare at the waitress a little too long. You might just forget to appreciate your girl and to tell her how much you care about her. If any of these situations happen to you, here's what you need to do:


You forgot to give her a gift for something:
I may like honesty, but I would actually recommend that if you can get away with lying in this situation DO IT. Women associate gifts with how much you care about us, it sounds insane and greedy, but in this society where your fellow men screw you over by being jerks, your girl will worry that your words and actions could be lies. A gift is something concrete. It lets us know that we are cared for and that you want to provide for us, which also makes you incredibly sexy and irresistible (also see future article, How to get what you want in bed). By giving her a nice gift, you will be showing her that you are future-husband material (and Cosmo has said that girls have better orgasms when they're emotionally attached). So make yourself emotionally-attachable, men. Now that you're convinced that you need to do something for said holiday, here are my suggestions:
1) As soon as you find out about said holiday, call her favorite restaurant and make a reservation. During this call (if you know you have time) ask if you can stop by and bring flowers to be set on your table prior to your date (this will make it appear as if you've been planning this date for a while). Most restaurants will think this is adorable and totally help you make it a very special night. If you do not have time to get flowers, ask the restaurant if they have anything special they could add (it might cost a bit), or if they could just add some extra candles to your table and seat you in a more secluded area.
2) Tell your girl that you will pick her up tonight for dinner. This way, she will have time to get ready and you will have time to grab an acceptable gift. If you live together, this may be tricky, but if you have to admit you're going to pick up the flowers you "ordered" for her (if your flower store doesn't have ready-to-buy bouquets grocery stores like Giant Eagle usually do).
3) Enjoy your night and remember to say lots sweet things. You'll thank me later. ;)

You checked out another woman: 
Guys, I cannot stress this enough, but whatever you do DO NOT check out another girl in front of your girlfriend. I accept that sometimes you just want to look, but unless you want to deal with an insecure girl the rest of your life, don't do anything to cause her to rightfully be insecure about your feelings. It may seem like common sense, but I find that often times it is now. If this does happen, own up to it and be honest. Try saying (in a very manner-of-fact way), "I'm sorry for looking at someone else. I forget it is something that I shouldn't do because to me no one will ever compare to you." Wait here for a response. If she is still upset, continue with, "(Insert girlfriend's name here), I'm sorry if I made you feel insecure, but you never have to worry with me. Okay?" Don't go on and on about it or she will get even more worried. Short and sweet and to the point is the best way to go. Oh, and congratulations on becoming a ninja because you just dodged that bullet.  

You said something stupid:
This is a lengthy post so I'll make this short. "(Insert girlfriend's name here), I'm sorry I said (whatever you said) I was (insert emotion here) and it was so wrong of me to hurt your feelings with that lie. You are the most (opposite of said stupid thing). I never want to hurt your feelings. Can you forgive me?" Giving her the choice and admitting you were wrong are the perfect ingredients for a quick "I forgive you". And whatever you do, DO NOT BLAME HER! Good luck! :)